Is your spouse’s recent behavior inconsistent with what you're used to?
- Is he having more meetings than usual these days or not picking up your calls as he once did?
- Is he spending more money than usual?
- He never leaves his phone anywhere you can possibly access it?
- He suddenly has to work Saturdays, and comes home smelling like soap?
Could he be cheating on you?
Not so fast...DO NOT ACCUSE HIM OF CHEATING "YET" IF YOU WANT THE TRUTH!
You can’t jump the gun on mere feelings, because it can really ruin your relationship if he isn't cheating, and put your partner into stealth mode if he is cheating.With that being said, if your gut is telling you something isn’t right and you want to do a little covert snooping, then you owe it to yourself to do it.
For now, simply sit back and carefully observe him.
- Is he all of a sudden getting buffed?
- Have you recently been excluded from the social gatherings?
- Did his phone and Facebook passwords suddenly change and now a big fat secret?
- Did your spouse buy new, sexy underwear, but you've never seen it on him?
- Do you get an increasing number of hang-ups or “wrong numbers” when you pick up the phone especially if the caller hangs up after hearing your voice and doesn’t speak? A normal person would at least ask for a person before hanging up.
- Is he deleting the calls from his “caller ID”?
- Does he go to the store for groceries” (a task that should take just a few minutes) and comes home 2 hours later?
- Does he show “new moves” in the bedroom?
- Does he go "off the radar" when you try calling him?
- Are their too many missing moments?
- Is he showing a sudden interest in a different types of music that he didn't like before?
- Does he delete emails the minute it comes in, and then delete the trash to make sure you don’t see it?
- Does he delete his browsing history?
- Does he head straight to the shower after work? Did he always do this?
- Does his clothes smell of an unfamiliar perfume?
- Things not adding up?
He will make mistakes and the truth will eventually come out.
As you observe, never let him see you sweat!As you develop your investigator’s character, don't make obvious changes in your behavior. Your husband (or wife) will wonder what you're doing. Most of the changes in your attitude should be in your head. Be a good loving spouse on the outside, a spy on the inside.
Listen to him talk!Most of us are simply waiting for the other person to stop making noise long enough for us to make our rebuttal. Because cheaters are constnantly making excuses, they ramble a lot, and in doing so, they give up valuable information. All you have to do is pin your ears back and listen. Listen with mesmerized attention with all the charm of a detective. Your spouse will see you as attentive and will enjoy hearing the sound of his (or her) own, never-ending voice. Listen to everything he says in all of your conversations:
- What he articulates!
- What he leaves out!
- What he amplifies!
- In what way he says what he declares!
- Names, dates, and places he leaks!
- Who he was with, where he went, what he did, and so on...
Trust your gut, start paying more attention, never blow your cover, and investigate when you know it's time!